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All Good Things

All Good Things

Posted 02-01-2018

Loathe as I am to spoil your January dear readers, and I do appreciate that many of you still have ‘Happy New Year’ ringing in your ears, but this first column of 2018 will also be the last. The Chamber will no longer be featuring in Business Matters, hence my words of wisdom will no longer soil the pages of the Obscurer.

I do need to thank those that have helped me write this column these last 8 years. William and Charles, Rudyard, Terence and Douglas, and on at least one occasion the Reverend Awrdy.

I have had a count up of how many I have written. I am not vain enough to cut them all out (ok I am, but I actually haven’t) but I have 99 originals stored on my computer. Have I, like most Englishmen when it matters this winter, fallen short of my century? Well I don’t actually have the first couple, so I will claim an unbeaten ton. My name can therefore go up on the honours board of local fish shops, where the columns of course become the next day’s chip wrapper.

My thanks to colleagues at Let’s Do Business Group for giving me the heads-up at least 2 weeks in advance every month, even though they know full well that I won’t even think about putting pen to paper until the night before it is due.  However like all good columnists I never miss a deadline. I just get them to extend it for little old me.

My final thanks go to my loyal army of fans (ok, maybe not an army but a platoon at least), most of whom curiously seem to be non-chamber members, who have always provided me with feedback, encouragement-and the occasional correction. I should have known it was time to stop a year or so back when one of them said to me ‘even if your name and photo were not included I would know the words were yours-your voice gets in my head’. I knew then that my work here was done.

There is talk of a periodic electronic newsletter for Chamber members, in which I will appear, as I am not giving up the Chairmanship-not quite yet anyway. I don’t know how the vision of a virtual Galbers appearing out of the ether appeals to the members. It scares the willies out of me.

I guess there will be a few who will be glad to see the back of my literary contributions. Our Caledonian cousins, a few politicians, Trump and Mrs G spring to mind. For anyone who took offence, and who on this Twelfth Night would quote ‘it is better to be a witty fool than a foolish wit’, suggesting I am the latter, I humbly and sincerely offer a heartfelt raspberry.

So as we come to the end of this particular Winter’s Tale, exit Galbers stage left followed by a bear. In the absence of a bear, a few rancorous Scots, for is there any other kind? (oh come on it’s my last one!), a mad president, the editor of the Obscurer and Pippa Middleton’s lawyers.

Live Long, and Prosper.

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